the big oak

When I think about forever and all that means, I still think of you.

The planets are aligning for me in generous ways. It’s spring and I feel better. I feel like smiling. I feel like sitting still and letting gentle breezes brush across my face. I feel like walking barefoot in a creek and lying on my back in the tall grass while making animals shapes out of the thick white clouds. I feel like kissing and holding hands and breathing deep satisfying breaths. My heart feels like a balloon. It’s light and I pretend that if I breathe in the air from it I could make funny words with my expanded voice.

Mostly, I feel like sitting on the patio of that big coffee shop and staring right into your face as I listen to you. You and only you.

Yesterday I climbed the big oak
behind the barn in the backfield
driven up high
where the robin waits with open arms and where the eagle’s cry.

I am just a simple loner wanting to fall
to drop away from my own cold heart
and the shattered hopes of whispered love songs again.
I’m restless like a feather in the wind.

instead, I listen to the voices on the ground
telling me to fly on up higher
to try and move past the birds and get clear of the trees.
I just can’t fight the breeze.