late night

It is late or early depending on your perspective. I just got back home from the Cactus Cafe. SG was playing to a surprisingly large crowd. Pepper’s out of town so I went solo.

It was a night like it used to be not so long ago when I was single. Being single for so long, I developed a habit that is in some circles defined as “stalkerish”. Until now, I never understood this inclination. So, I wear the label proudly. I still have mixed feelings about how my passion for this music get misinterpreted so often. It’s love but it’s not LOVE.

The music in the world has always inspired me but there is something about susan’s work that goes right past my ears into places way past the surface. If I were a song writer, any kind of writer, I suspect that I would find this in myself and not in someone else. On rare occasions, my own poetry takes me somewhere near to that place but only next door to it. To feel words, have them rattled around over and over again goes deep and more personal than anything I know in everyday life.

The inspiration of her music is one reason I am writing again. I had stopped doing it for so long – only a poem here and there. One day I woke up single looking for the things that defined me. Following local live music led me back to my own writing. I know I am lucky because now that I have discovered my own words again. And, I have people encouraging me and music inspiring me.

My thoughts are scattered now. It’s Justin’s birthday today. Is his life good???

I wonder what Pepper is doing right now? Probably sleeping. I suppose I should be too…

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