So, I haven’t been blogging in sometime… having given up livejournal for my own obvious reasons. I put up some information on myspace but with it’s less than favorable reputation with those in my work community, I think I’ll keep to the music and away from the blog there.
However, I have been writing more lately. I’ve spent a good deal of time journaling, mostly poetry. And, I am feeling more than inspired to finish the short story project that I put away so long ago.
There is something to be said for the inevitable lightness that comes when you are relieved of relationship burdens.
I don’t think I’d make a good reviewer. You have to have the ability to write critically and I just don’t have the skills. But, I’ll tell you Susan’s cd is exceptional. ..so here’s my amateurish review.
In Outerspace, songwriter Susan Gibson has found a cd that is travelling in the same direction as her unique personal style. Using skillful and mature variations in the delivery of each song, it stands out like the songwriter herself, being unique in some ways and traditional in others. Her second solo effort is packed full of a variety of styles from country to folk to simple down home roots-rock. She’ll even tell about her Methodist rap song in her introduction to “No Fair”, sure to come with “potato chips sprinkled on top”. With the addition of some ethereal qualities like the ones found on “Still Time”, it is suitable to represent the title, Outerspace. She is even bold enough to experiment. While it is not this reviewers favorite result, she gets points for keeping true to her own creative vision. This is her most collaborative project to date with cowriters like Jim Lauderdale, “Happiest When I’m Moving”; Randy Scruggs, “Upon Re-entry” and others. A live version of “Wide Open Spaces”, penned by Gibson and made one of the most recognized country songs of all times by the Dixie Chicks is included.
whatever, i tried.
I am watching the Indian Runner. The movie, inspired by a Springsteen song, was written and directed by Sean Penn. I think springsteen and penn could be the same person.
It is a starkly beautiful movie shot in the early 90’s but has the very feel of a movie crafted out of 70’s style cinema. There is an extraordinary collection of odd characters as well. The socially inept pink lady is a priceless detail.
In thinking about it, I tend to be attracted to those characters who are both beautiful and dark. Who are in constant conflict with their internal tenderness and the ghost that haunts their very soul making them crazy, mean or both. They are always adored and feared equally by the ones who love them.
What is frustrating to me is that I am unable to write one of my own. There is no clear way I can realistically demonstrate the conflict or the melancholy or the tortured internal struggle. And moreover, I do not seem to have a genuine way of showing human fallibility without trying to justify its existence or explain it away. I want to and I have tried over and over again to create someone I believe in. Always unsuccessfully.
I love the soundtrack…especially that Jefferson Airplane song. It just puts me in a mood.
I saw you. I saw you, coming back to me.
I am writing all the time now…little stories as I mow the lawn or drive down the street. I am carefully constructing these little fantasies of worlds in turmoil or more of a utopia than my own. Stories, that for the first time, are not my own. Real fiction. I never get them down anywhere so they just drift away. And, they are mostly forgotten by the time I sit here or near the journal beside my bed.
Fall might actually be here. Maybe to stay. I went to the state fair this weekend with my camera hoping to get something gritty and dark. But I didn’t. Everything was clean and the carnie workers were all dressed in the same white shirt and black pants. Except for the occasional missing front tooth they were looking quite respectable. And suburban. Instead, I ended up with bright colors and blue skies and my friends eating snacks from the “I can fry anything vendor”. The new car building and surrounding ten acres of new cars was like being at the showroom, even fresh carpet on the ground. The exhibit buildings were all smooth and cool and even the bathrooms were fresh. What is happening? I think I’ll have to go down once at night, to see if darkness changes the atmosphere. Maybe nighttime drains some of the vibrancy out of it and gives it the edgier quality I expected.
I want to explore everything right now. To take my camera and capture things that are broken and falling away before they finally do.